First Oil Paint

 

Well I am not much happy and satisfied with the first work trying this new medium. Through this I just learned how tactically it is required to blend the colours to put into one single picture that has to be already framed in mind. I think I got too excited having a new medium and brighter set of colours that I couldnt anticipate where the painting was going. Although what I like about this painting is the straight merged monochrome boxes that took me to 3 separate times after every dry-up.

 

The arms, shoulders and shoes of ballerina took up the colours very nicely, infact even the dress draped a little glamour with the blue and white tone. Flowers disappointed me cause they had to be milder and soft and tender which on the other hand ended up as wild ones. Still lots can be done to modify the mood of the picture. At least I am happy the main work is complete. The journey is more than one month old.

 

Outstretching my arm, I leap over and hover in the sky to look up for my dreams locked somewhere among the clouds over my head.

 Neways Just tried to edit the digital print by inverting the colours and found it a bit eclectic. Looks different and gives a clear idea where the lines and curves are straight and perfect. And defenitely flowers look far better here.!!! Her yellow ballet shoes are lovelyyyyyyyyyy!!!

 

My companions.

 

My office desk and cabin invites me every morning at 9:30 AM to get reserved and occupied for next 8 hours. My workplace is not much tempting to create an anxiety for daily projects and I have to sometimes create my own personal corner with some adjuncts to keep me at ease under the pile of files and tasks. Some little things that cheer me up at the times I skip my work attention. These charmers around I can say allow me bear the 8 hours of drudgery which definitely is turning me lesser of a fun receptor during the schedule. The round pumice stones held in my palms percolate the calmness into me through my skin and of course serve as my personalised paper weights. My lovely duos from the frame keep me inspired and motivated to love my job and deliver just what is required. They keep me connected to myself. The one hanging chain of the damsel, a reminder of some fortuitous delights in life that we often receive and love to treasure just because memories and moments could be frozen. The only memento of such an event as of now that I do have makes me feel still alive and full of feelings that give my heart a compensatory elixir. The pen stand that is always in a hope of a nice ink-filled pen and stationeries to justify its presence allegedly holds up all my chits containing some scribbles. Often all these get hidden behind the scattered papers and files all over my desk and give me an impression that like them I too get carried away by the diurnal reservations and the moment I clean up, I feel light and fresh. These are my companions beholding me as a keeper, instilling a tinge of faith to overcome all odds and recreating a diorama of my personal essence.

 

Can I say: Do not go, Please....

The injustice, the unfair surprises, the peevish destiny, the indelible memory, the mortal harassment, whatever one may call it but death remains unhampered, uninfluenced by the screams and deafening cries of all those who have lost their companions, families, relations. It makes us realize time and again just when everything in life goes smoothly that even when we do not want to think about it, it has the freedom to sweep anyone of us anytime, no matter what how much we are addicted to mortality.

Sometimes we hear or come to know about someone whom we just knew somewhere in the garden of yore and are actually not related, that he/she is no more.That feeling of restlessness towards an unattached person whose stories had no common chapters with that of mine indicates that the fear of loss is one of the greatest fears against which we do not have any weaponry to confront rather accept and then move on hiding it somewhere in the dark of our heart. It's like snatching the right of a person who might had to do many more and go far afield before having the final submission. The thought itself  makes us looking up for all our dearies without whom we cannot imagine our lives at all.

Death will not compromise, neither should life. Somethings cannot be changed like the uncertainties in life. Hearing the news of demise of someone who was as normal and hearty as we are today passes a heavy smoke down the spine that tomorrow or some day in unseen future ahead we might not be contributing to the energy this universe shares. Let it not call as a preparation for death but by not whining and not cringing for what we did or what we  not, we may start our preparation for a life. Being the custodian of our own life and respecting everything that comes along, let us try to overcome this fear.The strange human heart has the strongest fractals potent enough to absorb every vile event, drink every poison and still remain hopeful that tomorrow will be brighter. 

I wish I could feel the fragments of those lost in the clime, gone forever, whose faces will never appear again, whose fragrances still linger in the memory lanes of their dear ones and whose influences have brought changes.I wish all of us to have a great life and anytime if anything unpredictable happens to anyone just consider it as another sign of life that it is never alone,its end is glued to it.

Live happy.............

Just read somewhere:" Life asked death" why do people love me and hate you?"; Death replied," It's because you are a beautiful lie and I am a painful truth."

I do not agree to the life part in this quote but still believe that yes life is beautiful and definitely death is painful.

Peep Inside

 
As on a request I elaborated," What lies before us or behind us is tiny as compared to what lies within us."

It's all about the mind game. The inputs to it are the consequences of endless thoughts and practices surrounding us in the social gossamer manipulating our originals. Since childhood we are in the company of several people lumps of whose perspectives create layers in our mind. We sometimes become traits, the other times incomplete ourselves. Till we realise the completeness and power of one soul we wander in a sphere of piracy.

Think good and real and same will be reflected in what you do which will not only help us prosper but will also lead us to improvement every time. Peace is often robbed when one’s thinking is altercated when he is reluctant to accept the change. Our course of actions and tendencies are generally to safeguard what we believed cause there lays a general tendency to prove self-righteousness. It is hard to be invisible in the world where our thoughts contribute to the synergy of this universe. In such a case it becomes difficult to preserve the chores of our own mind that has infinite power to blow out all the blues till it is realised.

John Hilton says, “The mind in its own place and in itself can make a heaven of hell, a hell of heaven.  Our thoughts refine our deeds and make us even more confident in what we do. Appreciations and humiliations, applause and rejections are some social fringes that appear to measure our performance but in reality what stays as an undefeated truth is that it never matters what we did or what we do but all that matters is what we create. Treat people with respect, accept humbleness, try to doff envy, try to make a strong and powerful interior and there will be no thoughts undone. It sounds utopian but is really effective in leading a sound life with beams of positivity shining in the aurora of our personality.

On the seventh cloud



Winged with the balls of wool hanging in the clear sky,
all alone in the ebullient times...

 
Up Up Up in the air
When I leave the ground to hop
My feet leaves the wet soil
and joins the carnival at the top.

A swing with a wing
Hooked by the golden twinkles
flies through the fliting clouds
where hiding moon smiles and tinkles.

I am feeling the air
tickling the sole of my feet.
O' how happy do I feel
in the world of my dreams.
















With the lil' one who sits inside since always..

This side of a woman was seldom touched by me before where she has a part of her future child always in her just because of the gamut of feminism that she has. With this child who talks to her, shares with her, listens to all her doubts and is actually has just half of her impressions creates a intuitive connection with the other half sitting somewhere in the smoke of future.With this child of which she has the only clue of that unknown intruder, she waits and waits for the man of her life.....



 

My Life

"Key to happiness is to do what you love, with people whom you love"

Well the line seems simple and attractive,cherishing rather. Just remember what you really want to do when you are left with no imposed work and finally when you stand behind to listen to your meek, helpless heart. The heart which is too much manipulative to keep us occupied with the diurnal hangovers and still complains of not being pleased and satisfied. It always has some unfed desires that somehow somewhere remains startled. What to do, how to keep it happy and how to know it is happy?

One method is to have a foresight. Imagine your oldage filled with barrage of mixed memories. You are basking on the only chair you reserved for such precious times in the balcony and retrospecting into the yester years. Will that feeling be full of pride and satisfaction that whatever you did or did not has not contributed to any kind of discontent or guilt. Or something you really wanted to do which you can definitely do today, you couldnt and now you are left with nothing but the fateful designs of brutal meagre time. The ones you wanted to love, the ones with whom you had to share a lot of things, the passion you held and followed, the loose ends that still pinch you hard inside and the glories you collected throughout your age..all will come back as a reflection of a great life you made. Start living your story to give it a perfect ending. Spin a dream, follow it, make it true, embrace the nature, respect the lives of others, feel the good and the bad, do mistakes that do not leave behind an unmangeable repentence, keep your friendship, fall in love, fight everyday to make it the best day and say at the end "I had  had a great life"..And if still something is left behind which always does, stand up and get going...........

A hop

I wish to lie down
Under the sky full of stars
that often look like me
a heart full of scars.

A far fetched dream

to sew the tottered soul

And breathe a lot of sighs in

the chest that bores a hole.

Nebulous seems my life

dodging from a fall

A bliss that is awaited

to make a happy stall.

Waiting is not fair,
when all we can do is do
Collect all stars, make them shine
Make the life full of clues.

No more am I tired,

No more am I blue

What I did and What I will

is where my heart takes me to. 

The swing of gall and gag

that flies from down to the top

takes me through the clouds overhead

where it's always fun to bounce and hop.

Dedicated to  the regular visit of mood swings that take us to a tour to self realisation where we feel happy and sad, low and raised, robbed and filled all at the same time. It is all about how we keep on hopping between the two juxtopposite feelings which in real sense lie at a common conjecture and in no time we revert back to where we really want to. Now the same can be read again(6 stanzas but 3 in a row for being blue and 3 in a row for being blessed).