One seat

Train anxieties are intriguing. They discover some of the most mysterious sides of us which remain hidden in our daily chores. They are of  many kinds. Lets have a look on some of the most common feelings(I guess) everyone of us must have experienced while travelling in Indian trains which carry not only humans but stories......many interesting stories....

Suppose you board a train in your reserved compartment, eagerly searching for the allotted seat numbers and finally when you find it,you see,it is luxuriously being enjoyed by some stranger as if he was born on that seat. And you ask,

 " Excuse me where is your seat?" 

Sometimes they smile, sometimes they don't rather accuse you through their looks for encroaching their freedom of sleeping and basking. But usually they reply back with some unsaid or fumbled or entwined words leaving just a portion of our very own seat. Even in cases where the unwanted person tries to be friendly, genuinely, our instincts say it is for their interest to borrow some more time there. And many times they succeed in doing that because we fail to move them out. But until they get up because of any reason, my mini me keeps pestering me, 

" Is it okay to be generous and let him be for the sake of humanity? Or Should I rudely ask him to switch or get away because I am not interested in socializing? Should I be humble and polite or authoritative to get things done? " This small and trivial incident instigates my entire personality for what kind of person am I? In that short period, that one seat becomes my prized possession like a life time earned property on which I cannot bear any share. 

It all depends on the situation, the type of person he is and the type of person I want to play with him/her. It all comes spontaneously. But in every case, at the end, it proves one thing, we humans get attached to any thing very easily and for the sake of the attachment that makes us comfortable we often forget who we truly are...........One seat and all this fuss in mind...well this mind deserves better...

Palette

It has been again very long.As a usual trait of procrastination, filled with gluttonous matter to write about, let me quickly post some of the recent paintings as an elixir to the weight of my head....

Krishna

peacock on the railing

3 little angels

Recent colors

Before I display the diorama of my newly developed garden and the decor of my home let me first fill the backlogs of my recent paintings that this space has missed. Oil paint that calls for an exaggerated patience has been kept aside after I painted Buddha and a lady going to temple. Acrylic gives quick results and hence has been the medium for all the recent paintings I have completed in last few months. I am getting better at the mingle effects with practice with acrylics. Initially they seemed stiff and adamant to get diluted leaving marks of strokes. But gradually I am getting into techniques I guess. let us have a tour of these colorful portrayals which are already hung on the walls of my home.....

 This one is the latest creation. I have always been fascinated towards such kind of mythological, story telling, captivating paintings that contain a serenity in the expressions of the characters and a surreal landscape. Depicting the selfless bond of love between Krishna and Radha that involves her demands and his pampers, where there is a contentment in their sharing and a sense of peace in each facet of their friendship.

An abstract of Radha-Krishna with dry brush strokes depicting all kind of emotions: Love, compassion, anger, friendship, devotion and reverence....

A gift to my brother on his engagement. A peep into the past, taken from the alleys of childhood where we are unknown to the fact what we would grow into. Where we don't even bother of the future and wear a carefree mood of fun and laughter always. Those days seem bygone.....

Another trial of Buddha midst of the noise of outer world seeking silence and peace.......

The whisperer

Friends

Glamour of royalty

Amer Fort

The personal corner of the house that entertains in ma 'me' time.. 

The sultry look-She might be coming from an Arabic land with a strength in her eyes and an unbeatable compassion in bewitching looks...

While traversing the nature at times, it is least intervened when it comes out in its purest form..... The faith and devotion offered in these moments strike the deepest core of the soul and silence brings serenity..

Back with a pen

What else could be the best time to revisit my own blog after a long break in the beginning of a new year with an undeclared but self proclaimed resolution that I will re-vitalize my writing to keep me breathing with sighs of contentment. Actually this time due to non-availability of network and of course absence of me most of the times left this blog with no posts since months. Internet and connectivity with the outer world has become the topmost priority for everyone today making us feel alive among our friends and family. The moment I reach my office I log on to my network and become available for all those who also might be sitting somewhere with their screens on. The moment I come back home, I get to my phone for any text messages or updates on social sites. All these trends of the day alias distractions have made me an impostor who is stealing away the true self. And the tragedies with books is the greatest. Recently I heard Gulzar, the famous enchanted Indian lyricist reading some of his lines on how we have distanced our tiny little happiness that we used to receive every now and then after technology took over. About how books plea from behind the dusty glasses of the cupboard for being read. About how we have forgotten the charm of finding out an old letter or a note or some shrivelled flower that always spoke of some old story close to the heart. It is really painful to find ourselves in the ocean of digressions where we we find no harmony in what we think and what we do, in what we speak and what we seek.

About being away from the true self, I guess there may be many reasons. Many times we feel that there is a mystic silence in the mind, where we strive to think something but still no sign of any thought is revealed. And sometimes a whole cobweb of thoughts each fighting for their revelations come up making the brain to explode. In both the cases, I get the realization that I need to clear my head from the dust that flies from outside over the days. And this can only be done by either penning them down here or putting them on canvas. A light, fresh and new breeze follows keeping every thing back in place which few time back seemed scattered and tangled.

So as of now this post has washed off a bit of my load that I was carrying. Tomorrow is Weekend and I guess I will get plenty of stuff to stuff here. Signing off with a quote before I fall in slumber," There is lot unknown, lot undiscovered, lot un-realized, so keep looking for adventures in life, keep beading your experiences to make a strong trail of beliefs, keep adding radiance to your soul, keep improving!!!"

Learning Oil

Oil Paints are really testing me out. It is tough to be patient knowing that its effect can be marvelous. I always wanted to paint Buddha who seems to be a source of calmness, peace, knowledge and eternal light. Though it is not as I thought. Painting shall get better with more strokes I guess. The only thing that bothers is that the oil being used for the purpose empties out from the bottle very frequently. Buddhism is an interesting legacy that I would like to read. Inspired from my own painting I wish to paint many more Buddhas..........

Just imagine!!

Today I saw water breathing. Yeah really it was. While dechoking a service water line at my workplace, the drained water kissed the muddy pathway and carved out its own channel of drain. Since the water was in motion, it perhaps swept off the thin bottom layer of the soil creating tiny vortex ending up into bubbles that swam on the surface.Those bubbles were in number but were bursting quickly creating as many ripples as were they making the channel a corrugated stream.

The gift of imagination is precious. I am not self-aggrandizing myself but just putting up a selfless thought. Keep a doodle and ask someone to frame different pictures in mind. There will be a number of illustrations depending upon the way we have trained our mind and thoughts. Amidst the busy lives, we often create an incessant momentum where the link with the inner self is lost awhile till we take a moment every time to retreat. That moment may be very short or just in the form of a deep sigh provided it should release all the knots from the mind and cleanse the bowl before it spills.

Whenever I go out, meet people, hear them out, I conclude that I am not very fond of socializing. There are so many emotions attacking straightaway from their words, some good some bad some harsh some funny some astonishing and some unique creating an instant emotion in return in our minds.Mine is already filled up with my own gnarled up questions that often it feels clumsy to accommodate inputs from outside. 

Meditation is a way to focus all the scattered bits at one place and make something brighter and clear out of it. I guess it may be done in several ways. The true and regular practitioners might have developed an inherent appeal to be at self in hitch hike conditions unlikely people like us who understand its importance and crave for it only then when their soul seems to be are in trouble. Putting right colors on the canvas is a kind of meditation for me. Writing this post that is entertaining my old me is a kind of meditation for me. All that shuts my mind for a while seems to be a meditation for me because it is the only time where it remains quiet.

Going to sleep now. Ancora imparo has been lonely since few months. So I guess I shall re start my frequent postings. Till my next post keep imagining and keep retreating!! cheers!!

The inside upheaval

A day off is also not helping. In the world of adulthood where we are bound by a categorical routine to go to a place where what we do feels like an act of drudgery, something which is not from our heart. A lot goes in the mind, settles down, rise again and settle down yet again. It hurts to admit that nothing is being done to break the continuous whining of the instinct which raises its head time and again to exclaim that something somewhere needs to be changed. This self captivation which is refraining my freedom of thoughts and freedom of being my own is really frustrating and often steals all confidence and faith gradually. The only thing that helps or better say acts like a healer is my words which ease the entire conundrum by contemplating the tangled wisps of thoughts.What not is to write. Everyday we experience so many events, some bad some good. If all is written the volume will be huge. But we don't. Words are spilled only when mind gets gorged enough to explode and just before the upheaval it clears off the margin a bit till the next time.

There are so many Whys and Hows. Life is running fast asking and challenging to match up its pace but unluckily again and again I feel like falling behind. Time is there for me offering its hand to jump and take a leap beyond the environment I want to change but that threshold seems afar. The only fear that remains behind is that what if this dormancy becomes a part of me. Riddles to solve, to bloom my soul, to feel like never before, to find the unknown............................all to do here before I leave ..