bungled defaults..

It is always good to forget encomium as soon as possible and turn back inside to look within where my god is still standing with the same coat of my being. It feels like being used and thrashed and adjudged and being scanned by bevy of people where my personal hut of reverie is lost somewhere in the midst of limelight and glamour of attention. It feels in such cases that we have been estranged to ourselves where the bareness of fragments further explores the nudity of the same being who needs not to be discussed and seen so frequently in the socialised world. It becoems hard and a bit source of thinking when the instinctive equipoise is disrupted and we try to find our selves  nowhere.
 Eulogy is good to ears but should travel a path not to the mind but to the memories only to be dusted off often whenever retrospection is required. ........will come back tommorrow......

midnight illusion

 where flows the color of  nature and where resides eternal peace...

nature as a ruse to love

somewhere in the middle of the most lively and whispering clime in the midnight of romance in the arms of the beloved,o' lord I wish time  to stay with me .....forever....

the gift

love in the air on the lips of the birdie

squacking and chirping the song of desire

drum beats of the raindrops falling down

the dulcet of nature to don and hire.

whoosh of the winds and creeches of the rocks

bending arms and dancing tree mocks

come in the slaps of air and rain

look at the land wet with jaunting grains.

open your window ,let us in

we bring the healing blanket of grin                                   

wrap it over and join to sing

pull over the bliss in the fling.

splashes of the water from the hit of the feet

fairness of the stems and the smell of peat

At blameless azure with hovering clouds

my heart pounces by leaps and bounds

you are in love

When you feel that not enough air is left to breathe out



But still you round the mouth to chase out the sigh at his sight


You know you are in love.


When he is sitting beside and allowed to stare at your being


And you have no words to converse with him


You know you are in love.
When you come back home and lie down


And stress on the things you said and the ones you didn’t


You know you are in love.


When he comes and you start looking around


To fool him that you don’t steal his thoughts


You know you are in love.


With every doorbell and din of bikes


The heart propels with the beats at knolls and dells


You know you are in love.


When you dream of him in the custody of your heart


And wake up with a big smile on your face


You know you are in love.


When at every pleasant event you think of him


And at every ominous call, you pray for him


You know you are in love.


When in ennui you just want to remember the moments together


And close your eyes to make a wish


You know you are in love.



On a day when everything seems to go wrong,


You forget all your worries once in his arms…


You know you are in love.


When during a serious fight


You smile by mistake


You know you are in love.


When every step he takes has a consequence upon your being, and,


His thoughts define your every move


You know you are in love


When his smile just brightens up your life


And a speck of gloominess on his face makes you feel inert


You know you are in love


When he’s not there but his frangrance lingers


And his tender touch gives you heebie – jeebies


You know you are in love


When his tears fall onto your cheeks


And your heart breaks apart


You know you are in love



When tease of friends and hoots aloud


Makes you proud to have him around


You know you are in love.


When the game is on in the eyes


And gooseflesh deeper in the nerves


You know you are in love.


When he scolds and shuts the lips


And you follow without any say


You know you are in love.

When there is something he needs to know,


no matter where he chooses to go .


you say “you are a part of me


cause you are the root and I am the tree”


You know you are in love.

पल

जीवन की राह में

जब आये वो  पल

जो हंसाते हुए रुला गए

और रुलाते हुए हंसा गए,

तब मालूम हुआ मोल

शायद,

इस  जीवन का

और मूल्य

इन पलों का

जिनमें थे कुछ

मुस्कुराते चेहरे

और

उनकी बिसरी याद I

किताबों के

सुर्ख पीले पन्नों पर

अब भी मिल जाते हैं

वे थोड़े शब्द,

जिनकी श्याही भी सूख चुकी है

सुनाते   हैं  पर जो  ढेरों पुराने किस्से I

पर

पलों और किस्सों के सागर में

डूबकर भी

निकल नहीं पाती

यादों की वह  चमकती मोती

जिसे सहेजा था हमने

कभी I

पन्ने पलटने से डर लगता है अब

उस अँधेरे से

जहां कुछ नहीं है अब

न हंसी,

न शब्द,

न किस्से,

न पल,

न कोई मोती I

याद

आज कई दिनों के बाद

मालती की महक ने

महकाया है मन को                                   

जैसे अलसाए तन को                                                                                        

सूरज की किरणों ने

दे दी हों

करवटें I

और आज

कई दिनों के बाद

आई है उसकी याद

जब

करवटें रह गयीं खाली

reminders of time

I got up late today,merely 20 minutes to get ready before the bus had to come.Any how I did it and came back to office with the same mood of desuetude.The  bus  time  I consider to have special 13 minutes of reverie where thoughts are quite gross and raw. I was thinking what if I would end up as nothing, with no achieved goals and no cherished supermoment. This is something that is not impossible and may happen to me. I may get the stroke of vacuum in my life. Life accomodates copious stories with some lessons, some grudges and some memories and every story seems quite different potending that at every stage of our lives we change and sometimes the change is big. Seeing others being so normal, unperturbed, quiet and progressive towards future I feel little bit like an outcaste having so many puzzles and a repulsion towards simplicities.

I was thinking of the faces whom I admire and adore, many from my families, some among my friends and few among new aquaintances. They all seemed simple and happy in my vision inviting me to join the pool of glee with them by stop thinking and listening to the mind chattering. The sinecure leaves me no choice but to give lift to all my hobbies and intrests but with them  it is like a sympathetic attention without any justice. Everytime being a fatalist doesnt help to mainatin the patience when results and outcomes seem a consolence and fallacy.It dwindles and robs the confidence away for whatever strategy a person has to fight against theself created world of querries.
Sometimes life offers unpredictable happiness to gather and sweep inside the bag of strong and powerful memories which become the healer at times we are torn out of the fatigue offered by the same life. This may be a moment of friendship, a moment of love, a moment of laughter, a moment of applaud, a moment of care and a moment of affection.Moment  passes and moments have passed,few and many which often stretch smiles along my lips in the times of spare. Nothing stays even when we wish hard to it.Time is sublime and hence we are under its doctrainaire.Reminders of time leave behind a trail of blurred vision like the only  colourful stroke on the gray canvas.May the characters from past come alive and the times re appear and may  I revive.