A day off is also not helping. In the world of adulthood where we are bound by a categorical routine to go to a place where what we do feels like an act of drudgery, something which is not from our heart. A lot goes in the mind, settles down, rise again and settle down yet again. It hurts to admit that nothing is being done to break the continuous whining of the instinct which raises its head time and again to exclaim that something somewhere needs to be changed. This self captivation which is refraining my freedom of thoughts and freedom of being my own is really frustrating and often steals all confidence and faith gradually. The only thing that helps or better say acts like a healer is my words which ease the entire conundrum by contemplating the tangled wisps of thoughts.What not is to write. Everyday we experience so many events, some bad some good. If all is written the volume will be huge. But we don't. Words are spilled only when mind gets gorged enough to explode and just before the upheaval it clears off the margin a bit till the next time.
There are so many Whys and Hows. Life is running fast asking and challenging to match up its pace but unluckily again and again I feel like falling behind. Time is there for me offering its hand to jump and take a leap beyond the environment I want to change but that threshold seems afar. The only fear that remains behind is that what if this dormancy becomes a part of me. Riddles to solve, to bloom my soul, to feel like never before, to find the unknown............................all to do here before I leave ..
